One of the highlights of my job is facilitating the JFS Caregiver Support Group. The group meets twice a month for those caring for a loved one.
Sharing the role of caregiving creates an instant bond between the members. The group is a safe place to share her feelings and to receive support. No one must apologize for negative feelings or hold back tears. All feelings are accepted in this group.
The group began in August of 2014 and was originally held during lunch hour so working people could attend. For several years, it was a brown bag event, but then I noticed that most people did not bring lunch. They were so busy caring for their loved ones that their own needs were often overlooked. A few months later, we decided to provide lunch for the group so they could take a moment for emotional support and have a meal they often missed. JFS has a private donor that has been providing lunches for 10 years now.
When a newcomer joins the group, without fail, the members explain that JFS has a private donor that pays for the lunches. As a facilitator, I often forget to mention this because I am focused on explaining the parameters of the group including confidentiality, but I am always reminded of the importance and appreciation of the meal provided.
Here are a few quotes from a thank you card they made for the donor recently.
“What a mitzvah you are doing by providing us with a wonderful meal! Thank you for taking care of us as we care for our loved ones.”
“This is the best gift I have received in navigating this end-of-lifetime journey for my parents.”
“This is the first time I have had lunch all week.”
“We care for ourselves last and would have skipped lunch today.”
“You make such a difference for us. Forever grateful.”
The members of this group become family. They support each other in tough times, laugh together and even vent negative emotions at times. As a facilitator, I do have a role to keep track of the time, so everyone has a chance to share, but mostly I sit back and let them support each other. It is truly a beautiful group of people and one that I too learn from. Recently, a group member's loved one passed away. The funeral was on the day of our group and so many of them wanted to attend to continue their support of the group member. I pushed back the time so anyone who wanted to attend could. At this service, we took up half a row of seats in support of the group member. As a facilitator, I could not have been prouder of the group. It is heartwarming to know and see the bond they share surpasses the hour of our meetings.
If you or someone you know could benefit from a Caregiver Support group, contact Toni Jacobsen at tonijacobsen@jfsnashville.org or 615-354-1672.
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